21 July 2014

Counting all the a**holes in the room...

"Counting all the assholes in the room, well I'm definitely not alone..."

One of my FAVOURITE Volbeat verses. 

I love it because it doesn't put the singer of the lyrics (whether it's Michael Poulsen or me in the shower or you in the car) on a pre-supposed soap box about themselves in and amongst the company they willingly or unwillingly keep. It's a self-aware, no-bullshit statement about shitty behaviour. More or less. The lyrics go on to expand the statement.

I say this because I'm definitely not alone. Nope. I'm just professional about it. Or at least I try to be. Maybe it's my job, or maybe it's just because I've just been an infinitely nice person my whole life, in where I've always understood and respected that people who serve you food, cut your hair, wash your car, pump your gas, or bring you that next size up are to be respected because THEY ARE SERVING YOU, but I-i-i-i-i would never show up to a busy, insanely populated business and place and make demands around closing time. I know I would certainly never throw a passive-aggressive temper tantrum in which I'm giving the workers their options of what they should do for me while cussing out someone on my cell phone (where the hell are we, New York?) and pacing like a peacock, emphasis on the last four letters, inside and outside the front doors. Surely, I wouldn't do all of that and not notice that the nice lady on the end staying after hours to ensure that I got my prized possession returned to me and paper work completed promptly; and then LEAVE on her, leave all the employees who were staying late, all the employees whose lives were suspended for my selfish purposes, to pause and stand agape at my big-fish-in-a-little-pond superiority.

At least I'm pretty sure I wouldn't. Counting all the assholes in the room...

For the sake of balance and empathy, yes, if I were a hot shot big whig (in the middle of a farming state?) with lawyer-type deadlines and traveling with duress, I may be irked that I had to wait a meager twenty minutes after day's end to retrieve the end product of service requested.

But let's get real here: you called, you wanted shoved into a line up that pushed other customers (who were there first) to the side, we accommodated anyway, we told you five o'clock, and you called three, four times to check on the status of your order well before then (try all day), we continued to tell you five o'clock and you were still mad and dissatisfied.

The only thing I will give you is that we weren't done by five. We made you wait a half hour extra. For a job you demanded get done ahead of others who were ahead of you. Our bad?

At least you're not the only one in the room...